missing you endlessly

i absolutely have no idea that we would become this close when i first saw you during chingay practice. thank God i met someone like you. i didn't know i would be so comfortable around you. it's like we can always relate to each other in so many ways. i still have more to discover about you. it's so fast right? i mean, we almost know each other for a year. wait, a couple of months more to a year. can't wait to celebrate our birthday together next year! miss your hugs already! i'm glad that i'm having so much fun around you. i mean, i'm always laughing whenever i'm with you. all my worries are like washed away whenever i'm with you. it's like you're the waves and it washes off my worries that are written on the sand..

okay.. so where do i start now? hm. i'm late today. don't feel like blogging. don't know what's holding me.. again! i suck for not being able to control my emotions. muhd azree is making me restless again. like.. the tweet that says the smell of my perfume is still on his jacket. i mean, it's so hard for me to get over and done with him if he keeps reminding me of stuff that has a relation between us. okay syairah, control your emotions. not gonna blog any further. don't feel like blogging about yesterday. my day totally suckass. november can suck it up cause december is coming fast. i hope it will be a better month for me. today is the 1 year 1 month! sigh have a good day ahead guys! bye

breaking dawn

so basically, breaking dawn was beyond amazing. i would rate it.. 11/10. i'm gonna watch it again. i just can't get enough of it, i swear. the situation lately sucks. though it has been a hectic week for me, i'm trying to cope with the situation i am facing now. this.. sucks, a lot. i might say i have been crippled by love and i mean it figuratively okay. i know this isn't an alarming news but yeah.. it's a thing where girls usually get. i mean it's normal to get this crippled by love disease or breakdown or heartache disease. though i know i'm suffering from heartbreaks, i know i can pull this off. i know i'll be fine. okay lets get over and done with it. i'm trying to keep myself busy these days so that i can eventually forget muhd azree.

i didn't enjoy my day today. i don't know why but everytime my brain tells me to go out and have fun, my heart tells me to pull over and stay at home. heart over mind. i really don't know what is stopping me these days. maybe the weather, maybe the people. maybe the money or maybe my total laziness. i really don't know what's the real answer to it but it can be any reason that i can find. so i sat at home today, fried some instant prata (well actually only 1 piece) and ate it with sugar because there's no gravy. it's so pathetic i mean there's no food at home but thank God some instant prata became the savior (savior not from danger or harm but from hunger and lack of cooking knowledge. hehe not really lah :p). so i had the most 'bopian' situation in my life just now. how i wish i can spend the whole day in happiness not from all this stuff. idk what stuff basically.

okay i'll update if i have the time again. it sucks now that lam sold the camera that we had put our hearts and money in it to get that freaking dslr and now he sold it! fuck him fuck it fuck everything. now i'm left with my normal canon camera that will always make me look like i'm freaking ugly but now i really don't care because whatever happens, happens.. though deep in my heart i know things are going out of the way, i always tell myself to always.. smile

successful attempt?

so hows my attempt in doing this? most of my friend says it looks realistic and i hope it is cause if it is, i am able to convince people this is real! LOL. i hope this contribution leads to a success for the RCY! having test tomorrow. if i pass, i'll be a certified first aid-er for now and i can save people's live, insyAllah. wish me luck! everything has been fine, alhamdulilah and the SFA isn't that bad. i manage to attend the SFA training to becoming a first aid-er. kudos to myself! okay that's all the update that i have for now. have a goodnight, rest well guys! and bye

"just like cooking, you have all the ingredients but it's just that you have to use your own skills and make something nice out of it"

great weather

it rained again and i was sulking in the car as usual.. about the weather. i know i can do nothing to stop the rain. so i faced my fate today. i thought it would prolly rain the whole day but then when we reached ecp, the bad weather turned over a new leaf. the day turned out great. time to go sleep soon because i'm really exhausted goodnight, bye

rainy weather

sometimes i hate the rainy weather because whenever i have something beneficial to do, it all pours down. sometimes i ask myself why do i keep praying everything will be fine but reality is, it won't happen. though i know the chance of it happening is very little, i still pray that everything will have it's way through. i didn't know what hit me today in the train but i badly wanted to play roller blades. so i punched my phone keypad button and waited for a yes. there came the yes. got home and changed to something that would look suitable for a rollerblading day and got into the car. as we passed by MBS, the weather started to disapprove whatever plans i have had on my mind..

i cancelled the thought of rollerblading but deep in my heart i badly badly want to skate again. i took bapak's bicycle and went cycling off on my own. wondering about some things. looking at all the happy family together. soon came the pour down. quickly cycled back to the jetty and went to take my roller blades at abah's house. lucky me. don't need to get a new pair. in the end, i still got the chance to go rollerblading. can't say how it went but it all went the way i wanted it to be although it wasn't a good day. going to roller blade again tomorrow. hope it won't rain. i want a hot sunny weather tomorrow! have a good day ahead guys. goodnight, bye

ignoring

the reason i'm ignoring you is because..

1. you exaggerate a lot

2. you are straightforward but it's rude

3. your remarks are just unvalid

and i can prolly list more than all of this but i just don't want to. you just have a lot of crap to tell me and i don't need to know because i'm wasting my time. if you want to be my friend, you have to be sincere. i don't want to be known for a friend who.. well i won't say it but it's just negative. sometimes i have to avoid you. this isn't about anyone who influences me but it's just that my conscience tells me so. to avoid you. i can't say this to your face because i don't want to hurt you but i'm hinting you.. from now.. goodnight, bye

new friends

sometimes in life you have to accept what really comes and what goes. so what really came today was, new friends. though the company may make me feel a little awkward, they are really quite funny. it has been quite a long time since i laughed like i did just now. after all a laughter is healthy indeed. i've been putting on long sleeves/t-shirts and jeans with my usual sandals these few days because the weather just makes me want to slack. don't want to look overdressed. my phone is malfunctioning. i can't receive texts and calls and i can't send texts or make calls either. weird is.. the connection bar is full. what else is the problem? is starhub having difficulties now? don't know. have a good friday night and bye

early bird

look at me.. i look fat.. sigh. it's okay ah since now fat is the sex. okay just kidding. so it's almost 12am and i think i should go to bed after i've done blogging. so as usual i've stopped watching ratapan anak tiri and shall continue tomorrow. i know i've watched it but that drama keeps me alive. i mean, i would rate beyond the bar rating if i would. continuing episode 10 part 1 tomorrow. LOL what a cliche! my stepfather said the same thing he said months ago. i mean it's like dejavu because i've heard it and when he came out, i knew he would say the same thing. not a coincidence *whistle* 5 minutes to 12am i'm counting down every minute i wanna be an early bird! i don't want to publish this post at 12am cause i want to save tomorrow for blogging. life has been hectic! i know i said that yesterday but i still can't accept the fact yet! bummer. i'll be packed next week so all i will do when i blog next week is brag, brag and brag about the fact that i'm attending the stupid lame ass shitty training that i'm not looking forward to. sometimes holidays can be a bitch. what a luck, goodnight and bye

destroyed & constructed

life has been so so hectic right now. time is moving at a fast pace that i can't even blink for once. if i blink, i'll miss out everything in life. ceh. you get what i mean right? not literally saying i can't blink for once. it's more of a descriptive way here that i'm trying to put.. the situation now. as you can see my old blogger template has been removed. i've got nothing to blog now seriously now that i don't have any ideas. guess i'll take a break from all the excessive pressure. bye